Agony Read online

  Arsen: Okay. I hope you make it tomorrow...

  I didn’t respond. Instead I shut my phone off and closed my eyes. I’d let him sweat it out.

  There was no way in hell Adesynne would let me stay home. She had obviously come out here with more than one purpose.

  I woke up to the sound of the radio blaring in the kitchen and the smell of bacon. I sat up and rubbed my eyes before I went to join Addie who was shimmying to the song on the radio and throwing another round of bacon into the pan.

  “Good morning, sunshine!” she said when I sat at the island. “How’d you sleep? Have you talked to Arsen yet? When I do I get to meet the man?”

  I shook my head for a moment. Too many questions were being tossed at me already. I went into the bathroom and went through my morning routine. I brushed my hair, then my teeth, and then washed my face.

  Addie was leaning on the counter ready to barrage me with me more question, so I held up a hand as I went into the living room to retrieve my phone. I headed back into the kitchen, sitting on one of the stools behind the island and double tapped the screen. I opened my messages sent him a text.

  Me: We’re awake. What time is good for you?

  Instead of a text response, my phone almost immediately rang. I looked down at it and contemplated sending him to voicemail, but Addie came over to me and swiped the answer button.

  “Hello?” I asked giving her a dirty look.

  “Hey, I’m ready whenever you guys are,” Arsen said.

  “Hold on.”

  I put the phone to my chest and looked at Addie who was watching me with serious eyes.

  “Arsen wants to know what time,” I said to her.

  “Why doesn’t he come over and have breakfast with us? Then we can all go together,” she suggested carefully.

  “No,” I hissed.

  “Neve, ask him to come over for breakfast. You’re being too stubborn. It’s just breakfast. Then you can decide if you want to go with us. I can tell by the way you’ve been carrying yourself so far this morning, that you’ve been trying to figure it out anyway,” she said, turning back to the stove.

  I cleared my throat and tried to sound pleasant when I got back on the phone.

  “You can come over and have breakfast with us if you want. If you don’t die from Adesynne’s cooking, maybe I’ll join you guys today,” I said my voice dripping with fake sweetness.

  “I’ll be there in ten minutes,” he replied with a chuckle.

  I hung up without saying good-bye and put the phone down.

  “Well?” she asked without turning around.

  “He said he’ll be here in ten minutes.”

  “Then I guess I better make more bacon,” she said, heading to the refrigerator.

  Exactly ten minutes later there was a knock on the front door. I was busy reading news on my phone so I didn’t move. Not to mention that just because I had invited him over didn’t mean that I had to be the one to answer the door.

  Addie sighed heavily when Arsen knocked again. She wiped her hands on a hand towel and walked to the front door. I opened one of the drawers in the kitchen and looked for a hair tie. I heard her open the front door and rolled my eyes as they greeted each other brightly. I pulled my hair into a tight ponytail and went back to my news.

  I heard the door close and the sound of footsteps as they walked into the kitchen.

  The silence that followed would have been uncomfortable had I been a willing participant in it.

  Arsen jingled his keys in his hand.

  Addie cleared her throat.

  I swiped to the next news story.

  “You can sit next to sour puss,” Addie told Arsen. “She’s been a grouch all morning, so don’t worry about it.”

  I could sense the hesitation in his steps as he walked over and sat down in the stool next to me.

  “Hi,” he said softly.

  “Morning,” I replied curtly.

  “There’s no reason to be such a bitch, Neve,” Addie said.

  “You’re right. There isn’t. So if you’ll excuse me, I think I’m going to head out now. Have a great breakfast guys! Try not fuck each other,” I said brightly as I went into the living room and slipped on my flip flops.

  “Neve Grace Dutton! You stop right there!” Adesynne yelled as I got to the door.

  I had only ever heard that angry one time before. It was the first and last time I went out with her. Some guy had been aggressively hitting on me and I kept trying to shove him away. When he grabbed my ass and tried to kiss me, all hell broke loose in the form of Addie. She freaked out on the guy so bad that him and his friends left.

  I turned to face her and she grabbed me by the arm and dragged me back into the kitchen.

  “I never expected you to be the kind of person that would make assumptions based on what someone does for a living. You were raised better than that. You don’t have to be accepting of what Arsen does but you don’t have to be condescending either. Apologize. Now,” she said, scolding me.

  I hung my head. She was right; I was raised better than this. I was always told to never judge a person by what they did or a book by its cover. I glanced at Arsen with tears in my eyes and he was looking down at his hands on the counter.

  “I’m sorry, Arsen,” I whispered.

  He cleared his throat before he talked, “I don’t want an apology, Neve. I wouldn’t be here right now if I didn’t feel so strongly that something great could happen between us; I’ve already told you that. What I do want is for you to try to put what I do in the back of your mind and not think about it.”

  “That’s a fair request, Cuz,” Addie said, putting an arm around my shoulders. “Besides, it’s obvious that you two like each other. And you look damn cute together,” she whispered into my ear.

  I laughed and she grinned. I took a deep breath and let it out before I went back to sit next to Arsen who was still looking at his hands. I turned myself so that I was slightly facing him and he turned to look at me.

  I crossed my eyes and stuck my tongue out. He laughed and stopped fiddling with his hands.

  Addie placed two loaded plates in front of us before she fixed herself a plate and leaned against the counter.

  “You should probably tell me your full name too, in case I ever need to yell at you,” she said playfully to Arsen.

  “Arsen Caldwell,” he replied with a laugh.

  “I’ll keep that in mind,” Addie replied with a grin.

  I sat quietly eating my breakfast while the two of them talked. Addie asked him how long he had lived in Odessa Valley and she told him what New York, the real New York, was like.

  The house phone suddenly rang and I got up to answer it.

  “Hello?”

  “I’m looking for Neve Dutton,” a deep voice said pleasantly on the other end.

  “Speaking,” I replied curiously.

  “Neve, my name is Jareth Vance. I work for Golden Hills Media. I was told that you would be helping out on my set once we’re ready to start rolling, which will be very soon actually, and I wanted to set up a time to meet with you. Possibly a business lunch,” he explained.

  “Yeah that would be perfect Mr. Vance,” I replied excitedly. I recognized the name immediately. He was one of the hottest directors in Hollywood.

  “Jareth, please. How does today sound? Around noon?”

  I looked over at Addie and Arsen who were looking at me curiously.

  “Unfortunately I can’t today, Jareth. I have family in from out of town and we have plans today,” I replied.

  I mentally crossed my fingers hoping that wouldn’t make me look irresponsible.

  “Understood,” he replied kindly. “Why don’t you take down my phone number and give me a call later on this week. We can set something up then,” he suggested.

  “Okay!”

  I took his information and hung up the phone.

  “Who was that?” Addie asked.

  “Jareth Vance. The Jareth Vance and I�
��m going to be assisting him on his new movie set!” I squealed jumping up and down.

  Addie screamed and Arsen’s mouth hung slightly open.

  “Wow, Max really took care of you on that one,” he remarked.

  “Have you seen that man? He’s super sexy,” Addie said excitedly.

  I rolled my eyes.

  My moment was instantly killed. I could already tell what she was thinking. If Arsen and I didn’t build anything, I could try it with Jareth.

  “Actually, I already happen to know someone who’s super sexy and funny,” I replied matter-of-factly.

  “Oh?” she asked with a grin.

  “Yup!”

  “Who’s that?” she prodded.

  “I can’t tell you right now. He’ll hear me,” I said to her in a loud stage whisper.

  Arsen started to laugh and I glanced over at him with a grin. His face was bright red and Addie gave me an encouraging slap on the back.

  Good job, she mouthed approvingly.

  I smiled at her and went back to sit next to Arsen.

  “Thanks,” he said with a shy grin.

  I nodded with a smile.

  Addie smiled at us and I felt myself flush. I turned my attention back to my phone and swiped it back on. I clicked on my browser icon and went back to the news. Arsen leaned over and put his chin on his arm, reading along with me.

  One of my favorite songs came on the radio and I started moving around in my seat to the beat. Once the hook came, I sang along softly with it causing Addie to guffaw.

  “Every touch ... it would bring me to life ... I can only imagine what it’d be like ....”

  I looked up at her curiously and she wiggled her eyebrows. I gave her an odd look and she cut her eyes toward Arsen. I glanced at him and saw him giving me the same grin that Addie was.

  What the hell are they grinning about? I wondered in frustration.

  I retraced my words and felt my face turn bright red. I finally got why they were grinning like hyenas.

  “Grow up guys,” I grumbled.

  They both laughed. Arsen grabbed our plates and went over to the sink. He grabbed Addie’s plate while he was there and proceeded to wash them, then the pans she had used for the bacon and eggs.

  “Let’s get out of here,” Addie said when Arsen put the last dish on the dish rack.

  “Sounds good. You gals still want to go to the park?” he asked, pulling his keys out of his pocket.

  “Nah. I want to go to the beach. Come on, Neve. Let’s throw on some bathing suits and get dressed. We can stop by your place on the way there so you can change,” she said to Arsen as she pulled me off of the stool and dragged me into the bedroom.

  “Why the beach?” I asked her suspiciously once we close the door.

  “Because there aren’t any in Manhattan,” she replied digging through her luggage. “Get dressed.”

  I sighed and went over to my dresser and pulled out a one piece bathing suit.

  “I knew you were going to be boring,” she grumbled. “Put this on.”

  I took the two piece bathing suit from her and looked it over. The top was dark blue with white stripes and the bottom looked like boy shorts with a white anchor right on the rear.

  I pulled on a loose white t-shirt and denim shorts while she got into her bathing suit and clothes. She grabbed some beach towels and slung them over her shoulder, following me out of the bedroom. Arsen was patiently waiting in the living room.

  The living room! Oh God, I hope he didn’t see the vibrator and movie!

  He was actually watching TV, the movie still laying where I tossed it on the other couch. The vibrator however was sitting on the coffee table still.

  I felt my face turn red, but Addie saved the day, as only she could.

  “I was wondering what I did with this,” she said with a laugh, tossing the beach towels on the couch where the movie sat.

  She gave me a look to tell me it was my opportunity to hide it. I casually walked over and bunched up the towels, movie tucked safely inside, and went back into the bedroom shoving it into my underwear drawer.

  “I don’t think he saw it,” she said quietly as she shoved the vibrator in and closing the drawer.

  “Let’s just go,” I pleaded.

  She nodded as we went back into the living room where Arsen was still sitting.

  “Ready to go?” she asked him brightly.

  “Yeah. I was just watching that show you like,” he said to me with a smile.

  I looked at the television and laughed. The same show that he thought made me crazy was the same show he was watching now.

  He turned everything off and stood up. The three of us walked over to the door and he held it open over our heads to let us pass through. I turned around to lock it and he brushed a finger gently against my hip while he stood there. I looked up at him curiously and he smiled.

  I blushed.

  Again.

  Six

  The beach wasn’t very far away from Arsen’s house. In fact, he pulled into his driveway and told us we could walk from there if we wanted.

  “I’m gonna go inside and change, you guys wanna come in?” he asked unlocking his door.

  “Sure,” Addie said falling in line behind him.

  “No thanks,” I replied quietly as I sat down on his stairs.

  Addie shot me an angry look but Arsen understood why. He knew that I didn’t know what to expect walking into the home of a porn actor. For all I knew, he had blow-up dolls all over the place and huge framed photos of his sex scenes.

  “We’ll be right out,” he said softly.

  I nodded and leaned my head against the rail. I straightened my legs out and let the California sun start to slowly roast me.

  Ten minutes later they walked out.

  “Thank God you didn’t go in there. All the debauchery was almost too much for me to handle,” she said sarcastically.

  “It’s okay, Adesynne. Really,” Arsen said quietly.

  I looked up at them both and stared at Arsen. He wasn’t wearing a shirt and I was pretty sure that I instantly started to drool. I mean the body on this man was something that they probably fashioned the old Roman god statues off of.

  “Get up, Neve,” Addie said with a laugh. She could tell that I was dumbstruck by his chiseled body.

  “What?” I asked, looking at her in confusion.

  Arsen laughed and reached down for my hand, pulling me up off the stairs.

  He threw an arm around Addie’s shoulder and held my hand tightly as the three of us walked two blocks up the street before we found ourselves on the beach. Addie picked a spot close enough to the water where we would get some of the surf spray, but not get soaked by the waves. She pulled off her shirt and pulled off her denim shorts and made a beeline for the water.

  In a matter of moments, she was swarmed by men. I laughed and shook my head. Adesynne never had any trouble in the man department.

  “I think that could be more dangerous than sharks,” Arsen remarked with a chuckle.

  “Oh Addie can take care of herself,” I assured him with a grin.

  He smiled and leaned back on the towel giving me a curious look.

  “Do you plan on leaving that on?” he asked giving my shirt a tug.

  “Arsen, I’m sure you see enou—” I took a deep breath proud of the fact that I was able to stop myself from making a crude remark. “What I meant was, sure,” I said getting to my feet.

  I pulled off my t-shirt and adjusted my bathing suit top so that I wasn’t spilling out. Addie did this on purpose and I knew it. Then I pulled down my denim shorts and stepped out of them.

  “Happy?” I asked sitting next to him.

  “Hell yes,” he replied with a grin. “Why would you hide that body?”

  “You’ve already been hanging out with Adesynne for too long,” I remarked rolling my eyes. I pulled my legs up to my chest and wrapped my arms around them. “I don’t know. I just don’t feel the need to walk around para
ding myself, I guess.”

  “There’s nothing wrong in being confident,” he said.

  “Well, when I get some confidence, maybe I’ll walk around in a bikini all day,” I replied simply.

  “Do you have a boyfriend back home?” he asked, sitting up. I shook my head. “How come if you don’t mind me asking?”

  “Because I won’t randomly have sex. I mean I’ve been on dates with some really nice guys, but at the end of the night they all wanted sex, and I wasn’t willing to hand it over,” I replied with a shrug.

  “Yeah, a lot of guys can be douchebags,” he said with a chuckle.

  “Tell me about it,” I said with a laugh. “Anyway, that’s the main hindrance in my not having a relationship. That I won’t drop my pants.”

  “You shouldn’t have too. Not until you’re ready.”

  Word vomit. Oh God, here it comes.

  “Then why do you?” I asked him quietly.

  Arsen gave me a sidelong glance. He was searching my face for judgment of some sort, but I had already promised Addie that I would do my best to tuck that away.

  “I didn’t have any plans of doing this, if that’s what you’re thinking. I was out with some friends one night and Max was in the bar. He approached us because he needed someone to fill in a spot and he pulled me aside. He asked me if I wanted to do it, told me how much it paid, and I agreed. I planned on it being a onetime deal, but the movie was a hit and he asked me if I wanted to keep working for him. I was fresh out of college and I didn’t have a job at the time so I said yes. I just kind of kept doing it to pay the bills. It’s not like I have sex every single day of the week. Hell sometimes, I don’t have to shoot for months because the money is so good,” he said, picking up a hand full of sand and tossing it.

  “Does it make it hard to have a relationship?” I asked quietly.

  “I don’t know honestly. I never tried to be serious with anyone, because I don’t think many women would understand or appreciate what I do,” he replied with a shrug.

  “Doesn’t that get lonely?” I asked.

  “Yeah sometimes. That’s usually when I ask Max if he has anything for me.”

  I nodded and looked over at Addie who was playing tackle football in the water with about three guys. It was so easy for her and that always made me a little jealous.